For those who deal with bouts of boredom – real or imagined – and live within a two-day drive of Vidler’s, may we suggest an easy remedy – drive to Vidler’s.
Here’s how that works:
Cram everybody in the car and come on! The mere anticipation as you travel to East Aurora will terminate all traces of the torrent of tedium that has beset you, even before you arrive.
(We know we skipped a step. Stick with us.) Return home, if you can pull yourselves away. On your return trip, your time in our 5 &10 will have obliterated all memory of the monotony of your life before Vidler’s. You and yours will be happy campers who have erased not just the word “bored”, but the entire concept. Now for the step we skipped.
Roam the aisles. Any resistance to joy will be futile. We will conquer all of your determination to remain bored or cranky with a shelves full of Wind-up Chattering Teeth, rubber snakes, and our ever-popular best-selling Rubber Chicken.
Visit Vidler’s music section and hum your way out of boredom with the All Metal Kazoo. If you’re the sort who prefers chase away your boredom in an intellectual manner, this Kazoo is for you, because this is not just any ol’ kazoo. Take this kazoo with you wherever you expect to run into an intellectual and blow them over with the fact that New Yorker George D. Smith of Buffalo patented the kazoo in 1902. Further, many of the world’s kazoos are still made in nearby Eden, New York, at the Original American Kazoo Company. In the unlikely event that a trace of boredom remains when you make the unhappy decision to leave Vidler’s, we guarantee that a 30-minute side trip to Kazoo Boutique in Eden will wash away all vestiges of boredom.
We have crafts. We have a Vidler on the Roof. We stock kitchen gadgets that strike fear into the heart of all turkeys. (We are so committed to breaking your boredom that we are going to debut this original award-winning dad joke: What do you get when you put a frozen turkey in a hot oven? Drum[stick] roll: Gobble warming! [© 2022 The Birdsong County Bloodhound] ) We have cookie cutters, orange peelers, wooden toaster tongs, and wax lips, which, like the kazoo, were invented in Buffalo.
Did we mention our Yodeling Pickle? If you doubt that a pickle that yodels has anything to do with chasing away boredom, consider the words of the man whose company gave birth to it: “Having been born and raised in Ohio,” he wrote in his autobiography, “I understand boredom in a profound way.”
This, however, is not the story of the birth of a singing pickle. We are talking about a game with a similar name that was birthed on a badminton court in 1965 during an outbreak of teeny-bopper boredom on the isle of Bainbridge in Washington. You can read about it on the official Pickleball website.
So today’s suggestion for beating boredom: Learn to yodel with one of Vidler 5&10’s pickles. Or learn to play Pickleball and take your Yodeling Pickle with you. You can play in East Aurora.
Yodeling Pickles. Vidler’s 5 &10. Etc., etc.
See what we mean? Boredom isn’t welcome here! But you always are!